Ladies and Gentlemen of the Jury

Opening Statements in My Cousin Vinny

It’s Saturday Night

A respected criminal lawyer was delivering his summation to the jury in a missing body homicide case.

“Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury,” he said.

“In exactly 10 seconds when the clock over the door in the back of the courtroom strike 12, the alleged victim in this case will open that door and walk into this courtroom alive and well.”

He counted down, “10-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1-0”

He turned and gestured to the back door. “You can come in now,” he said.

The door did not open.

He faced the jury.

“Every one of you looked at the door and you would not have done that unless you had a reasonable doubt.”

The jury only deliberated for about 20 minutes when the foreperson sent a note out to the bailiff advising that the jury had reached a verdict.

After the jury returned to the courtroom, the foreperson handed the verdict to the bailiff, who handed it to the judge.

“Will the defendant please rise,” he said.

Then the judge read the verdict,

“We the members of the jury find the defendant Guilty of the crime of Murder in the First Degree.”

The lawyer and his client were devastated.

After the defendant was removed from the courtroom and taken to jail, the lawyer approached the foreperson and asked,

“How could y’all convict my client after every one of you looked at the door?”

“Well, we found him guilty because he was the only person in the courtroom who did not look at the door.”

Although the video is 15 minutes long, it’s rolling on the floor funny.

Check it out.

4 Responses to Ladies and Gentlemen of the Jury

  1. Jim Wilder says:

    Hi. The content is really Good

  2. Elizabeth says:

    It is possible: A bumbling fumbling attorney can still do a great job of convincing.

    It is possible: A jury can keep their concentration on the fact and not allow their themselves distracted by a lie/lies

  3. Unabogie says:

    Law humor 🙂

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